Today was a short day at work so after my much needed and much hated workout, I still had time to do some much wanted shopping. I cut my coupons, made my lists, grabbed my reusable bags, and headed to the store. I was about 10 feet from making it inside when I was cut off by an elderly woman walking slower than anyone I have ever seen. I'm talking slower than regular old people slow. At first I was agitated, I mean I couldn't pass her because that's rude, but I wasn't sure we'd even make it through the doors without them closing on us. She was THAT slow. She's not part of the actual story here, but she reminded me, and so I'm reminding you, that there's really no hurry. Slow down and enjoy the walk every now and again!
Back to the original point.
When I finally did make it into the store I was oddly aware of how disposable everything was (everything except my reusable bags, of course!). The carts are now plastic, the displays change almost weekly, even the clothes are made with little quality. I pushed that feeling down, acknowledging the fact that I probably thought a lot like the elderly woman at the entrance, "Everything is so temporary these days. You kids wouldn't have been able to survive back in my day."
I pushed my plastic cart towards the shampoo aisle since I had some coupons for the good stuff! The aisle should have been labeled "Aisle 14: Plastic Products Good For One Use Only". Again I had that nagging feeling that everything is now so disposable, so temporary. Right there, surrounded by scents of lemon melon burst and berry berry beautiful, I started thinking about how little in our lives is actually reusable, long-lasting, or even permanent. Things aren't made to be fixed anymore, they're made to be replaced. Maybe you know a person who is always getting a new car. How about all of the people who line up for a new phone to replace their fully functional phones. The keyboard on your laptop breaks, you replace the whole darn computer. There is only one woman I know of that actually mends ripped jeans. The point is, the majority of our life is filled with one use, disposable, no-fixing-only-replacing, upgrade-as-soon-as-possible things. In the midst of all of this, is it any surprise that lifelong friendships (I'm talking ACTUAL not just Facebook friendships) and marriages seem to be disappearing faster than your roll of paper towels?
I have a touch of hoarding mixed with a love of recycling, making it a struggle to throw things out or replace them - fixing something is just such a rewarding feeling. I fear that many of us are so surrounded by the disposable that we've lost the desire and the ability to fix things when they're broken and to take care of the things we have in order to keep them from breaking in the first place.
I began to think about how many friendships I've let dissolve just because I didn't put effort into them, or how many marriages I've seen end in divorce because "we were young and we're just different now" or "I just couldn't live with her anymore" or "I think I need to see what else is out there". I see this all the time. The fact is, sometimes relationships end because people don't know how - or don't want - to work on fixing them. Why fix it when I can upgrade? This breaks my heart. Don't we know that old or familiar or broken doesn't mean dead or done? Diapers, trash bags, those are disposable, but people and relationships shouldn't be.
Meeting new people is great, and I enjoy making new friends, but my best friend from middle school knows my history, knows my likes and dislikes, she can cheer me up or talk some sense into me. I value her. If we argue, we forgive and move on. My husband has seen me at my worst and he's seen me at my best. He knows me better than anyone in the world. Isn't that connection and familiarity comforting? Don't old jeans just fit better than new ones? Some things are worth cherishing, taking care of and fixing.
My challenge to you is to find something broken and fix it! Start with a pair of ripped jeans or an old piece of furniture. Put some effort into it. You'll be reminded of how awesome it feels to make something whole again and to give something new life. Maybe you'll be reminded that new isn't a synonym for better and that relationships and marriages aren't meant to be disposable. Some things can last a lifetime - even in the year 2014!
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